


My Heart Is Stone And Still It Trembles

by justonemorelie



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-20
Updated: 2013-05-18
Packaged: 2017-12-08 23:59:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 11,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/767622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justonemorelie/pseuds/justonemorelie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>texts are in itallics</p></blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

  
“They say that the smallest event, even the flapping of a butterfly’s wings, can change the future in ways that you could never even imagine. Maybe that’s why I find it so hard to pinpoint the exact moment, the exact decision that determined the events that unfolded that night.

First of all, I should remind you that I am not the type of man who typically expresses his emotions quite so plainly, but of course you know that. You’re the only person that I can trust, the only person I’ve ever been able to trust, that’s why I wanted to tell you everything that I’ve never been able to put into words. The story of how everything happened in my eyes, how everything changed and how everything continues to change, all because of you.”

**One year earlier.**

“All I’m saying is that The Revolution would’ve gone so much better if I was there.”

“Babe, that’s because you have textbooks full of each side’s tactics… and that’s cheating!” Grantaire smirked at his boyfriend of a year and a half, “I’m going to get another drink,” he continued, “can I get you boys anything?” Enjolras, Marius and Combeferre shook their heads, Grantaire simply shrugged and walked away. That’s when Marius turned to ‘Ferre,

“So, did you ask her?” The man’s silence was answer enough for Marius. “Honestly man, you can’t spend every minute complaining about how she doesn’t even notice you and then not invite her to our party.”

“It’s not a party,” Combeferre sighed, “and I doubt that she’d want to be around us for a whole night anyway.” ‘Ferre always had a habit of criticising himself; the years of constantly coming second to Enj had enforced his thoughts of being inadequate.

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” Marius whispered in the least subtle way possible before quickly standing and rushing towards the door. Combeferre turned around just in time to see the man tackle a blonde girl, who by all means looked much too fragile for such rough treatment, but anyone who knew Cosette also knew that she was much tougher than her china-doll like beauty eluded.

“Jesus, Marius!” called a dark haired girl as she emerged from behind the pair, “At least let me get inside before you block the entire doorway with all of your… couple stuff.”

“Oh, ‘Ponine quit your complaining!” Marius smirked at the girl before swooping her up in a bear hug. “Why don’t you and Cosette go sit with the others while I get you both a drink?” The girls silently agreed to the man’s request and began to very walk towards the back of the room where Enjolras and Combeferre sat.

“What should I say? What should I do?” Ep whispered to Cosette through gritted teeth, “I always make a fool of myself around him.”

“Just be you, it will all be fine.” Cosette’s tone seemed sincere, but Eponine was still apprehensive. “And besides, we had a deal, you have to tell him. Tonight.”

“But what if he doesn’t like...”

“’Ep!” Cosette knew exactly where this conversation would lead, as it was one that had occurred every night since her best friend had laid eyes on the beautiful statue of a man, Combeferre.

 _Shit_. ‘Ferre was not usually the type of guy who easily became anxious, but at the sight of Eponine he began to do just that. He attempted to nonchalantly straighten his clothes and fix his hair, but it appeared that his attempts were not successful as he could see Grantaire laughing as he sat down beside Enj. _Breathe, just breathe. Nothing bad is going to happen._

“Is… is this seat taken?” ‘Ferre looked up to see Ep gesturing to the space left next to him on the couch. He opened his mouth slightly, but no matter how hard he tried he just couldn’t force any words out. He nodded bashfully, avoiding looking into the girl’s beautiful brown eyes as she sat down next to him. _Dammit, now she’s going to think that I’m ignoring her. Say something. For God’s sake, say something!_


	2. Chapter 2

Before Combeferre got a chance to even express the simplest greeting to Ep, Grantaire interrupted with a drunken shout,

“Jehan! Courfeyrac! It’s about bloody time,” ‘Ferre turned to see the two enter the room. “I was beginning to think that you were both a bit too… busy to come.” Grantaire winked at his friends. Jehan and Courfeyrac had only been together for seven months, but it was obvious to everyone that they had given into their desires pretty early on.

“You’re one to talk, barely a day goes by where you two aren’t at it like rabbits!” The comment left Grantaire speechless, which was not an easy task. In a way ‘Ferre was grateful, this silence was the perfect opportunity for him to spark up a conversation with the girl beside him. He turned his head towards her, only then realising just how small the couch was, and just how close the two were.

“I didn’t see you in philosophy today…” Eponine blurted the words out when she’d noticed that the beautiful man beside her was looking; she’d begun to panic and said the first thing that came to her mind.

“Oh, yes…” Combeferre stuttered, “I had an idea about why there is always something rather than nothing and ended up buried in a pile of books in the library...” Eponine wasn’t even listening to the man, but was instead captivated by the way that his voice flew over each phrase, the way that his lips formed around each word, and it took every ounce of strength that she possessed to not spill her true thoughts and feelings. It wasn’t until a broad smile had come across ‘Ferre’s face that Ep realised that the man had finished speaking and was now staring intently at her,

“Stop boring her!” A voice shouted across the room, the two turned simultaneously to look upon the smirking face of Grantaire. The pair laughed, and the remark was quickly forgotten by the group when they began their small-talk again, Eponine and Combeferre slowly inching closer and closer to each other.

The hours passed faster than ‘Ferre had wanted them to. He wanted nothing more than to just sit on that small couch with his Eponine for the rest of the night, but as the hours dissolved people began to leave. As always, the first to leave were Marius and Cosette, followed by Enjolras with a drunken Grantaire hanging off of his arm, barely able to hold up his head. Ep looked up to the man sitting beside her and swallowed hard,

“Would you mind walking me home? I wouldn’t normally ask, but I don’t particularly like being alone at this time of night.” The words were a godsend to ‘Ferre. He had already internally agreed, but not wanting to seem too eager, he simply nodded and stood up with her. The pair said goodbye to Courfeyrac and Jehan, not that they payed much attention to their departing friends, Jehan was whispering something undoubtedly intimate in Courfeyrac’s ear. Combeferre simply laughed to himself and followed his Eponine towards the door.

The night air chilled Eponine and Combeferre to the bone, but the two of them were too caught up in conversation to care. They talked about everything and nothing, avoiding all short-cuts in an unavailing attempt to prolong the time that the two could spend together, unknowingly tangled in each other’s minds.  It wasn’t long until the two had reached the entrance to the apartment building, and both felt a remorse for the things that they had no courage to say, and the things that they had too much doubt to do.

Eponine smiled sweetly at the beautiful man standing before her and pulled him into a warm embrace. With her head on his chest she could hear his heart beating rapidly and in time with hers, she felt every breath and dreaded the moment that she would have to let go, but she released him anyway. In a rush of emotion, the dark-haired girl swallowed hard,

“Thankyou ‘Ferre,” she whispered, “Goodnight.”

“’Ponine, Wait,” Combeferre grabbed the girl’s hand before she got a chance to walk away. “Don’t go just yet,” he searched for the right words to say, begging his brain to find a way to keep her there and in his arms. “Just, one more hug…”

The words shocked Eponine but she complied, giving ‘Ferre enough time to carefully choose what to say,

“’Ponine, I don’t want this night to end like this, the way that it always does.” With no more words he placed his hand behind her head and leant in slowly until his lips met hers.


	3. Chapter 3

The kiss stole every last breath that Eponine never realised she held on to, for that in that fragment of time her whole world collapsed into this moment of pure ecstasy, a moment which she allowed to invade every inch of her mind. The two parted after what felt like hours of bliss, but could only have been seconds.

“I’m sorry,” ‘Ferre panicked at the look of shock upon his Eponine’s face, “I just couldn’t help it. I’m growing sick of always having to hide my-“ She interrupted his sentence with a kiss that was noticeably more passionate than the last.

“You don’t need to apologise,” her face relaxed into an intoxicating smile, “you did just what I’ve always wanted, but never had the courage to do.” ‘Ferre breathed a sigh of relief once he’d heard these words. The next few moments were a blur of emotion, but they unfolded with an invitation to dinner, and one last kiss goodnight.

 

‘Ferre had never been one to often become nervous about a casual event, such as an evening meal with his closest friends, but his Eponine had a way of making him feel inadequate and perfect all at the same time. He was so focussed on making sure that every last detail was perfect that he’d almost not heard the knock on the door which made his heart jump.

“About bloody time,” Grantaire shouted the second that ‘Ferre opened the door, “we’ve been knocking for ages.” ‘Ferre had been so preoccupied with the thought of his Eponine that he’d nearly forgotten that Grantaire and Enjolras would be joining them.

“Sorry guys, I couldn’t hear you over all the noise in the kitchen.” He hoped that his lie was believable enough to satisfy his impatient friends, and their reactions led him to believe that it was. Without another word he motioned his friends inside and quickly returned to his kitchen duties.

The minutes dragged on, and at some points even seemed to stop completely while ‘Ferre waited for the dark-haired girl to appear at his door. He tried to busy himself with last minute food preparation and his seemingly endless pile of dirty dishes, but by the time the clock read 7:15, he’d begun to grow increasingly impatient. _I’m such a fool, of course she wouldn’t show up._ But just as the thought had passed through his mind there came a knock at the door.

“Welcome, come in, you’re just in time, food’s ready.” The words rushed out of ‘Ferre’s mouth before he’d even had a chance to think them through. He led his Eponine to the dining room where Enjolras and Grantaire were seated and rushed back to the kitchen to bring out the food.

The group’s meal disappeared quickly, and the four ventured into the lounge room where they made small talk and shared a joke or two over a bottle of wine. As the hours rolled on, Enjolras and Grantaire made the decision to leave. They thanked ‘Ferre and made their way out the door and onto the nearly empty streets hand in hand, leaving Ep and ‘Ferre alone yet again.

The pair sat side by side in front of the fireplace and talked as the hours passed, unknowingly growing closer and closer over time until her head was on his shoulder and his arm was sitting calmly around her waist.

“’Ferre…” Eponine sat up and looked the beautiful man directly in the eye, “I, um…” she sighed and shook her head, defeated by her inability to find the right words to express her true feelings for the man beside her, “never mind…”

“Tell me…”

“I don’t know…”

“Please.” The man looked pleadingly into her eyes, she bit her lip and took a deep breath,

“I have really strong feelings for you, and I need to know if you feel the same. I’m so sick of torturing myself with the knowledge that you deserve so much more than what I can give you.” ‘Ferre looked at his Eponine, never had he seen her so vulnerable, so afraid, and the thought that he was the cause made no sense to him. He brushed her hair away from her face, letting his hand linger for a moment behind her ear before resting it on her neck.

“’Ponine,” the man sighed, he’d been fighting his urge to say these words for months, and finally letting them out was a similar feeling to surrendering in war. His feelings had overpowered him and he’d been forced to call back all of efforts in this instant of exposure.  “in most cases a man, once intoxicated, would turn and run from his inhibitor, but in this case,” another sigh, “in this case my drug is the kind which draws me in deeper with every breath. This intoxicant is one that I couldn’t escape, even if I wanted to.” He looking longingly into the dark-haired girl’s eyes, “My Eponine, the drug which I so willingly and desperately allowed to spread through every inch of my body is you.”

Eponine pulled the beautiful man into a hug and refused to let go until the pair had silently fallen asleep in front of the fireplace, wrapped in each other’s arms.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> texts are in itallics

When Eponine woke up she snapped her eyes open forgetting for a moment where she was, it wasn’t until she saw the extinguished fire in front of her that she allowed herself to relax into the bliss that was the memory of the previous evening,

“You’re up.” The familiar voice which greeted the still half-asleep girl and sent a burst of warmth through her chilled body.

“Morning,” she groaned out in reply, lazily stretching her arms out above her, “what time is it?”

“Do you have somewhere you need to be?” ‘Ferre tried to sound happy, even though he was dreading the moment that she would have to leave him. Truthfully, he’d awoken hours before the girl, but had silently relished the moments that he had been able to simply lay with his Eponine laying peacefully in his arms.

“No, not at all.”

“Good, have a shower if you’d like,” he smiled and reached out a hand to the girl to help her up and winked as he said, “I’m making pancakes.”

From that night Eponine and Combeferre were inseparable. He would go into the café where she worked and make ridiculously complex orders just to see her smile, and they would sit together in all of their classes pretending to be working hard. This went on for months, each day feeling like the night that they shared in front of his fire place. The two would spend nearly every night entangled in each other’s arms with her head rested on his chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat and lazily kissing each other until one or the other finally gave into sleep.

 

_“I can’t come and see you at the café tonight babe, I’m way behind on that essay._

_I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. Promise._

_-Ferre”_

His finger hovered over the send button for a moment, ‘Ferre wanted nothing more than to just forget the piles of schoolwork that had been building up around him, but he knew that he needed to do it. He pressed send and tried not to give in to the temptation to run to his Eponine, he shut his phone and sat at his desk, desperately scribbling on the piles and piles of paper in front of him.

 

The first clap of thunder woke Combeferre with a jump, he didn’t remember falling asleep but when he checked his watch he was relieved to see that it was only 8:30PM. He had only one thought on his mind from the moment he woke up, he pulled out his phone and quickly texted,

_“I hate this stormy weather, definitely need a certain someone to be here with me._

_-Ferre”_

He walked to his kitchen and began to make himself a cup of coffee, he could barely hear himself think over the sound of the water pummelling against his window so he doubted his own ears when he heard a faint knock at the door. ‘Ferre checked his watch, 8:34PM, he wandered over to the door curious as to who would be showing up at his door at this time. He unlocked the door and pulled it open to reveal his Eponine soaked to the bone and holding up her phone with his message on it,

“Great minds think alike.” Combeferre smiled as he motioned for her to come in. The drenched woman complied and walked inside while ‘Ferre rushed to get her a towel and some blankets. Combeferre couldn’t hide his curiosity,

“Why did you walk all the way here in the rain? I thought that you didn’t finish work until 9 anyway.” Eponine stared deeply into the beautiful man’s eyes, adoring the way that they were always swimming with questions that often had no answers. She wanted to tell him every little detail of her night, how she’d chosen to leave work early because she missed him the moment they were apart but with the mountain of thoughts running through her head she just couldn’t find enough words to express everything that she wished she could say. She quietly laughed at herself, wondering how she had allowed this man to be in control of every thought and every action. Eponine bit her lip and took a step closer to Combeferre until their faces were only a centimetre or two apart,

“I need you. Now.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck at writing this kind of thing, don't judge me.

Combeferre’s stomach clenched as he looked deep into the eyes of his Eponine and saw something that he’d never even noticed was there; he knew that he wanted her, he just never knew that he wanted her so badly. He swallowed hard when he realised that his breathing was becoming heavier, and his heart rate dramatically increasing. Eponine caught the beautiful man’s lips in a kiss as he coiled his arms tightly around her waist, pressing their bodies together. A shiver ran through Eponine’s body reminding them both of the drenched clothes that she was wearing,

“You’re freezing, Ep. We need to get you out of these wet clothes.” Combeferre blushed at the idea, he hadn’t thought enough about what he was saying before his words came out and he hoped that she hadn’t overthought it the way that he did. Eponine slid her hands up the beautiful man’s chest and around to the back of his neck, she leant in until their lips were only millimetres away from each other before changing direction and placing her mouth right next to his ear,

“I was just thinking the same thing.” ‘Ferre exhaled sharply before pulling his Eponine into a deep kiss and quickly removing her jacket. The two began to rush towards his bedroom, bumping into multiple pieces of furniture, neither one of them wanting to break the kiss. They reached the closed bedroom door and Eponine pulled away, breathing heavily she took a firm hold of the dark grey shirt that Combeferre was wearing and pulled it slowly over his head, enjoying the sight of his exposed skin before peppering kisses from his chest to his collarbone.

‘Ferre let out a shaky breath before pushing his door open with one hand and the other clumsily lifting the girl’s singlet off. He pulled her through the door and shut it behind them, never taking his eyes away from her, and lay her down on the bed before slowly climbing on to join her. Eponine lifted her head to see the beautiful man crawling up the bed, stopping as his head hovered over her stomach, he leant down and gently kissed next to her belly button before slowly trailing kisses up to her jaw, each kiss sending warmth rushing through her body. She let out a soft moan as his warm breath hit her neck, the sound made his blood rush south, he kissed her passionately and leant on his left elbow as he trailed his right hand from her shoulder and down to her hips where he slipped his hand into the top of her jeans.  He stopped abruptly and looked up at his Eponine,

“Is something wrong?” Ep barely pushed out the words, she was breathing too heavily. He leaned in and kissed her softly on the cheek,

“Tell me what you want.” She smirked at him, slowly reaching down and cupping him over his jeans before licking her lips,

“Can’t you tell?”

“Say it.”

“I want you ‘Ferre; I want all of you, every single inch. Now and forever.” No more words were needed, he lunged in for a passionate kiss, swiftly undoing the button of her jeans, pulling them off as she clumsily did the same to his. The minutes flew past in a blur of lust, and before they knew it they were seconds away from those ardent moments of exposure that they were so longing for. He reached down, running his fingers carefully on the outside of her underwear forcing a moan to escape from his Eponine’s lips, he smiled watching her reaction as he moved his hand to the inside of her underwear and rapidly became more aggressive.

Eponine was growing impatient, she moved her hand down quickly and tugged on the elastic of his underwear,

“Are you sure?”

“I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.” Her reply sent sparks through him, he kissed her again before reaching over to his bedside table to grab a condom. He rolled off the girl and pulled down his underwear, revealing just how painfully hard he was. He slid the condom on but before he got a chance to return to his position Eponine rolled over and climbed on top of him, she winked at him when he realised that she’d already fully removed her underwear. The sight of the dark-haired girl straddling him with her hands on his chest sent sparks of lust through his entire body. She leant down and kissed his collar bone, trailing her way up his neck and planting a soft kiss on his lips before slowly lowering herself down onto his erection.

‘Ferre let out a moan before taking a firm hold of the girl’s waist. She began to slowly move up and down, increasing the pace as they both became more and more comfortable with the ins and outs of each other’s bodies. They settled into a steady rhythm, each letting out blissful moans in these moments of pure ecstasy. Without warning Combeferre took a tight hold of his Eponine and rolled the two of them over so that he was now on top of her thrusting harder and harder, he could feel the orgasm building up inside him and the rate of Eponine’s moans led him to believe that she was almost as close as him. Eponine dug her fingernails into the beautiful man’s back and her whole body shook sending the final waves of pleasure through to ‘Ferre until he could hold on no longer, he came with a shudder and paused for a moment before finally allowing himself to relax.

‘Ferre pulled out carefully, removing the condom and wiping the beads of sweat from his forehead before quickly rolling back on top of the still aroused Eponine. He leant down until their lips were barely touching and hovered there for a moment. ‘Ferre could sense her desperation, he knew that all she wanted was for him to kiss her, but he was relishing the tension between them. The longing in her eyes was driving him crazy, she pushed herself up to kiss him but he pulled away, smiling playfully,

“Bloody tease…” Eponine laughed and let her head fall back onto the bed,

“God, you’re beautiful,” The beautiful man’s words made Ep blush, he brushed her still damp hair off her face and looked deep into her eyes before pulling her into a soft kiss. “I love you, Ep.”

“I love you too.” 


	6. Chapter 6

‘Ferre took in a deep breath before he had woken up completely; he was still blissfully immersed in the feelings that had come with the previous night,

“Morning.” The sweet voice forced Combeferre’s eyes open and drew him to the sight of his Eponine’s head on his chest, she pushed herself up and kissed him softly before rolling over and picking up a cup from the bedside table, “I made coffee, it’s still warm… I think.” ‘Ferre laughed as he pushed himself up into a sitting position and raised the cup to his lips,

“Perfect,” he smiled at his Eponine, “and the coffee isn’t bad either.” She couldn’t contain the laughter that burst from her, she was sure that she would never quite get used to the flattery that the beautiful man constantly bestowed upon her. ‘Ferre leaned over and placed the cup down, rubbing his face before getting up and walking to the bathroom, he’d always been fairly pedantic with his morning routine. When he returned to his bedroom he saw his Eponine spread across the bed and suddenly seemed unable to control himself, he lunged at the bed and threw himself on top of the girl, playfully kissing her cheeks, forehead and neck causing her to laugh uncontrollably underneath the beautiful man,

“St—What are you--“ Eponine found herself unable to form words through her hysterical laughter, she looped her arms swiftly around his neck and pulled him into a deep kiss which they both absorbed in perfect happiness. The two finally pulled away from each other breathing heavily,

“Any plans for today?”

“I had a few ideas,” She pulled him closer until he was close enough to hear the near silent whispers that sent shivers down his spine, he swallowed hard and managed to nod before attacking his Eponine’s lips with a passionate kiss, softly nibbling on her lip as he pulled away. Their hunger for each other grew as their bodies moved together completely in sync. The pair jumped as there was a knock on the door,

“Oi, ‘Ferre! Open up!” Courfeyrac’s voice boomed through the door, the pair looked at each other and began laughing,

“I better let him in…” ‘Ferre stood up and began to walk away before turning back and whispering, “and you better put some clothes on.” Eponine quickly searched the room and found her clothes lying in various areas; she smiled to herself whilst recalling every detail of how her garments got to their new positions. Just as she was pulling on her shirt Courf burst through the door,

“I’ve been calling you all morning! Jehan is sick and I can’t work,” He looked at Ep who was unsuccessfully trying to hide her laughter, “What? What’s so funny?” She stood up and walked towards him,

“You are so whipped…” before he could say anything she had walked away from the bedroom and towards the kitchen where Combeferre was making coffee. “Babe, I have to go into work,” she wrapped her arms around his waist, “I’ll see you tomorrow night, promise.”

 

A frown covered ‘Ferre’s face when he walked into the café only to see Courfeyrac behind the counter,

“Don’t look so disappointed to see me man.” Courf teased, but ‘Ferre was definitely not in the mood for such a joking tone.

“Where’s Ep?” He wanted to continue on and tell Courfeyrac that she had been ignoring his calls and texts but decided against it,

“She called in sick, I assumed that she was faking it so that she could spend the day with you…” Combeferre’s stomach dropped, he sat down at an empty table and pulled out his phone,

_“Ep, I’m at the café and you’re not._

_I’m going to have a coffee and then I’m coming over._

_I love you,_

_-Ferre.”_

He walked up to the counter and ordered his coffee before returning to his place and sitting in silence as he waited, a thousand terrible thoughts running through his head about what could have happened to his Eponine. He jumped as his phone went off, a reply had become something unexpected for him but expected or not, nothing could have prepared his heart for the blow that it took,

_“No._

_I will never forgive you if you come around here._

_If you come, I swear to God that I will hate you.”_


	7. Chapter 7

He faltered before building up the courage to knock. The door opened an inch when he struck it, Ep never left the door unlocked and would definitely not leave it open. He began to panic and quickly ran through the door, frantically searching for any sign of his Eponine. He heard a sob coming from the bathroom and sprinted to the door, he tried to open it but it was locked,

“Go away!” The slurred voice shocked the man,

“Ep…”

“I told you not to come!”

“I’d rather know that you hate me but that you’re okay than be sitting at home and –“

“Go away!” ‘Ferre had never heard his Eponine speak like this, not to anyone, he held back every urge that he had to just fall down and cry, he needed Ep. He leant against the door and built up all of the energy that was left in his worn out body to yell,

“Ep, if you don’t unlock this door I’m going to break it down, I swear!” A moment of silence passed before the door clicked, he breathed a sigh of relief, “I’m coming in, okay?” There was no reply, he walked in and was surprised to see that the room was almost pitch black,

“Don’t turn on the light…” The voice was no longer angry, it had changed to a tone that sounded so helpless that it broke his heart, “I don’t want you to see me like this.”

“Ep I need to turn on the light so I can find you without tripping over you.” He didn’t wait for an answer, he switched on the light and gasped at the sight before him; his Eponine huddled in the corner with a nearly empty bottle of whiskey in her hand. ‘Ferre swooped in beside her and threw his arms around the trembling girl, “Look at me, Ep.”

“No.”

“Please…” he softly placed his hand on the side of her face, guiding it towards him. The first tear escaped his eye as he spotted the welt on the side of her face, “Ep… what… what happened?”

“My father came to… visit today. I didn’t want to let him in, I didn’t want to talk to him but he pushed his way past me. He kept asking where mother was, and I was telling  him that I haven’t seen her for years, but he kept getting angrier and angrier, and… he was so drunk… and…” Her words were smothered with desperate sobs, she let her head fall onto Combeferre’s chest as her tears fell. “I’m sorry ‘Ferre, I didn’t want you to see me like this. You deserve someone who isn’t so weak,” He cut her off with a kiss,

“You mean I don’t deserve someone who’s so strong.” He wiped the tears from her cheek, letting his hand linger on the side of her face, “The way he treats you, the way that he’s always treated you… It makes me sick to think that someone so beautiful, so perfect, was subjected to things that no one should ever have to deal with.”

“I just want to forget…”

“Don’t think about him, Ep. I’ll help you through this, I promise you. I will never let you deal with this alone, I will never think that you are weak, and I swear on everything that we are and everything that we are going to be that I will prove to you every day how perfect you are and how much I love you.” Ep lunged into ‘Ferre’s arms and clung to him tightly,

“I love you, please don’t leave me tonight.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”


	8. Chapter 8

** CHAPTER EIGHT **

“’Ferre?”

“What’s up?” The pair had been lying in silence since ‘Ferre had managed to get his Eponine off of the bathroom floor,

“What do you want?” The question surprised the man,

“Like, right now?” he smirked at the girl, rolling over and trailing kisses up her neck. She giggled underneath the man’s breath,

“No… What do you want in the future?” He pulled himself up and softly kissed her lips, whispering,

“Can it be the same thing?” She laughed for a moment, stopping as she looked deeply into his eyes. “Okay… what do I want?” he rolled onto his back again taking his time to really think about his answer. “I want to live my life knowing that I could somehow make the most amazing girl in the world happy. I want to get a steady job, buy a house, get married…” Ep blushed, “uh… have a family. God, I really want a family. I just love the idea of teaching my kid about the sky and the stars and the bugs and things that will stop mattering when they get older and….” He stopped himself, looking down at his Eponine, “Enough about me… what do you want?”

“If I told you… I’d have to kill you.” She smiled evilly at the man,

“Oh, you little…” He pulled her on top of him and into a passionate kiss which grew deeper with every second that passed. She pulled away pushing the hair that had fallen on her face away, she slowly leant in until there was almost no distance between them,

“Close your eyes.” She whispered into his ear, sending shivers all the way down his spine. He complied, swallowing hard in anticipation of what the woman would do. The thoughts running through his head sent blood rushing south, and she hadn’t even moved yet. He felt his Eponine shifting downwards and slowly opened one eye, “No peaking!” she snapped at him,

“Yes sir.” This remark pried a laugh from the woman, but only momentarily.

‘Ferre jolted slightly from shock when he felt his belt come undone, followed by the button of his jeans and then the zip. He pushed his hips upwards when he felt Ep tugging at his unfastened jeans,

“Good boy.” ‘Ferre could only let out a slight whimper as a reply when he felt Eponine’s fingers lacing the elastic of his underwear, “Now relax…” Relaxing was the furthest thing from Combeferre’s mind when Ep pulled his underwear down, instantly taking him in her mouth. She waited for him to be less tense before slowly working her way down his hardened cock triggering moans which grew ever louder as she gained a steady rhythm. She swirled her tongue around him,

“Ep...uhn.” He could barely manage to speak; his mind was far too preoccupied. She continued to move up and down, and he could feel his orgasm building inside him at an embarrassingly fast rate. She could hear the quickening of his breath as well as the desperate tone of his moaning but she had one more trick left, she placed her hands on his hips before taking all of him in. He moaned and tightly fisted the bed sheets as he felt the tip of his cock hit the back of the throat, an almost inhuman moan was the only warning he could give the girl. He came with a shudder and finally opened his eyes to the image of his Eponine licking her lips as she watched ‘Ferre’s breathing finally slow to a regular rate.

“Wow….” The reaction caused Eponine to erupt with playful laughter,

“You act like you’ve never had a blowjob before,” He shifted uncomfortably, avoiding eye contact with the girl, “Oh my god! Are you serious?!” She began to laugh uncontrollably. ‘Ferre rolled over pinning her to the bed with her hands above her head.

“You can’t laugh,” He licked his lips as he looked down and then back up to meet his Eponine’s gaze. “You’re next.”

 

Jehan jumped when he heard a knock at the door,

“You expecting anyone?” He shouted to Courfeyrac who was still in bed. He opened the door to see Combeferre standing there, “Hey, come in.” Combeferre walked past him silently, avoiding eye contact. “Is… is something wrong ‘Ferre?” The man looked up to reveal a smile that reminded Jehan of a teenager with a crush,

“I need to talk to you and your other half.”

“My ears are burning…” Courfeyrac chimed as he walked into the room looping his arm around Jehan’s waist. “What can we do for you this fine day?”

“It’s about Ep…”

“Oh no…”

“What’s happened?”

“No… no, it’s nothing bad…” He hesitated for a moment before releasing his huge grin, “Can you guys keep a secret?”


	9. Chapter 9

“What time is it?” Ep groaned as she lazily opened her eyes stretched before nuzzling back in next to Combeferre who was playing on his phone next to her,

“Half past eight,” The reply was shortly followed by the man rolling over until he was on top of Ep, “you got work today?” Eponine struggled to reply as the man began trailing kisses down her neck,

“Must you do that right now?” ‘Ferre smirked at the reply and softly nibbled on her ear. Ep used all of her strength to roll the both of them over so that she was straddling him, “I start at 11, and I kind of want to have a shower first.” She jumped off the bed and quickly shuffled over to the bathroom leaving ‘Ferre alone on the bed. He heard the water start running and sat himself over. The beautiful man’s eyes nearly fell out of his head when he glanced over and saw his Eponine leaning against the door, completely naked,

“You coming?” ‘Ferre jumped out of bed quicker than either of them thought was possible. Before she knew it ‘Ferre had crashed his lips into hers, meshing their bodies together. Without breaking the kiss, she swiftly pulled down his underwear and instantly took hold of him. Ep pushed the man further into the bathroom, slamming the door behind them as she motioned for him to get into the shower. In seconds the two of them were kissing passionately under the running water. ‘Ferre pulled away and looked into the eyes of his Eponine, losing himself at the words that made him weak the first time that they were together as they escaped her lips again, “I need you. Now.”

Without a second thought Combeferre pushed the girl against the wall, prompting a moan of anticipation. He lifted her up so that both of her legs were wrapped tightly around his hips and quickly pushed himself inside of her. Her head fell back as he began to slowly thrust, quickening his pace as she moved her hips to meet him. The hot water cascaded over the two of them, their moans growing ever louder as they both felt their orgasms building inside of them. Eponine dug her nails into Combeferre’s back, scratching all the way to his shoulders hard enough so that she knew the reminders would be there for a while. She clenched around him with a moan, the sensation causing him to release with a shudder. His head fell onto her shoulder and he slowly put her down,

“We should do this more often.”

 

It had been a long day at work for Eponine, she’d been distracted for most of the day by the memory of the morning that she had spent with her boyfriend. She was exhausted when she got home, but disappointed to find that Combeferre wasn’t there. She walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water, she was so tired that she almost didn’t see the note that was on the bench,

**_“Ep,_ **

**_Gone to Jehan and Courf’s._ **

**_Won’t be back too late,_ **

**_Love you._ **

**_-Ferre”_ **

Within the first half an hour of trying to sleep Eponine made the decision to go over to her friends’ house to retrieve Combeferre, the house was only a 10 minute walk away.

She was just about to knock on the front door when she heard Courfeyrac’s voice from inside,

“Wait, so how long have you been together?”

“Ten months, you know that.”

“And how long have you been hiding this from her?” Jehan chipped in, the words made Eponine feel sick. What was he hiding?

“Only 3 months... It’s not that bad.”

“You’ve hidden this for 3 months? For as long as I’ve known you, you have never been able to keep a secret for more than 10 minutes!” That word again. _Secret_. Eponine felt the lump begin to form in her throat. She was trying her hardest not to jump to conclusions but every second it seemed to sound worse and worse.

“And she’s not even a little suspicious? She hasn’t wondered about all the text messages or meetings you’ve been having?”

“No, she’s always at work when they happen. She doesn’t suspect a thing.” The three men heard a crash come from outside. They rushed to the door to see a pot plant smashed on the ground,

“My roses!” Jehan whined from behind Combeferre, but he payed no attention to anything other than the shadow that he saw bolting around the corner.


	10. Chapter 10

Combeferre woke up early the next morning, the end of the holidays had come around much sooner than he’d expected but he was more disappointed by the fact that his Eponine was not lying next to him. He woke up and made himself a coffee before shooting off a quick text,

_“Hey babe,_

_I’m running a little late so I’ll just see you in class._

_Love you,_

_-Ferre.”_

Ep had arrived early to class for the first time since she began dating ‘Ferre, normally she’d rather indulge herself with an extra 10 minutes in bed snuggled up with the beautiful man but falling asleep and waking up alone had left her with no desire to linger in the bed. She was snapped out of her daydream when she felt his familiar arms wrapping around her waist, she was still trying so hard to be angry at him because of what she’d overheard but the warmth of his body against hers melted away the anger and left only the sense of betrayal that she simply couldn’t shake.

Through the whole class Eponine was distracted by her burning desire to confront him, to find out what secrets he was keeping from her. She waited until a video was being shown to finally speak,

“’Ferre… Would you ever keep a secret from me?”

“Depends on the secret,” He leaned in closer and whispered, “Like, I wouldn’t keep it a secret that you’re all that I think about, or that I can barely resist the urge to kiss you… all of the time.” Eponine let go of the breath that she didn’t realise she was holding and felt a smile coming to her face. She internally kicked herself for ever doubting the man’s loyalty to her, even though something deep inside her was still unable to let go of that single word that had somehow managed to consume her. Secrets.

“Combeferre!” The pair snapped up at the sound of their professor’s voice booming through the room, “I need to speak to you before you leave. The rest of you are dismissed.”

Eponine waited outside for Combeferre, when he left the room he was still talking to the professor. Ep only heard the last snippet of their conversation, “Thanks anyway sir, I just don’t think I can go.”

“What was all that about?” ‘Ferre had already rushed over to the girl, wrapping his arms around her in a tight embrace.

“He wanted me to go to some big philosophy thing in London, apparently I’m the first person from around here to be selected since, well, ever.”

“Are you serious? That’s amazing!” Eponine was genuinely happy for Combeferre, for a moment forgetting her lingering troubles, “But, why were you saying that you couldn’t go?” He looked down at the ground,

“Because I didn’t want to be away from you for 3 months…” She shook her head and lifted his head up to place a soft kiss on his cheek.

"You're an idiot, you know that right?" He nodded his head a little too enthusiastically before taking her hand and beginning the walk home.

 

“Which secrets would you keep?” Eponine finally said after minutes of walking in silence, something inside of her simply couldn’t forget about all the doubt that had been built up inside her. She’d been apprehensive about going to the pub tonight but Cosette had pleaded with her so that everyone would be there to hear her big announcement.

“What’s with all these questions about secrets? If there’s something you want to know, just ask me, you know I wouldn’t lie to you.” Ep just looked at ‘Ferre, she had no answer for him. “Fine… um, I’d keep it a secret if I was planning something for you, or maybe if I was told something in complete confidence. I don’t know Ep. You know that I’m terrible at keeping secrets. If I did keep one it would have to be something really important.” She nodded and tried to forget the thoughts that were rushing through her head as the pair walked hand in hand down the street.

 

“You’re here!” Cosette’s voice chimed the moment that Eponine and Combeferre walked through the door, “Sit down, sit down! Now we can tell everyone our news!” The pair was thrown onto a couch before they’d even had a chance to realise what was going on. They motioned a greeting to Enjolras, Grantaire, Jehan, Courfeyrac, Joly, Feuilly and Bahorel who were all sitting there looking as rushed and confused as Ep and ‘Ferre. They sat impatiently as Cosette and Marius stood quietly arguing over who was going to say what.

“Just one of you tell us already!” Shouted Grantaire, who was somehow already drunk. He elicited a death-stare from Cosette, which quickly melted away when Marius motioned for her to give the news that they had been so eager to deliver,

“So, as you guys know, myself and Marius have been engaged for a while now,”

“You’ve picked a date?” Jehan guessed enthusiastically. He’d almost been more excited about the wedding to be than Cosette or Marius.

“Good guess, but no.” Marius finally chimed in, opening the floor for Cosette to finish her announcement. He wrapped his arms around her waist whispering in her ear so that no one else could hear what he said,

“Well guys, we asked you all to come here so that we could tell you,” She looked at Marius and then back at the faces staring at her with anticipation, “We’re having a baby!” The room fell silent for a moment before erupting in cheers as each person rushed to congratulate the couple, asking thousands of questions even though it was made clear that it was too soon to know of the answers. After taking their time to speak to Cosette and Marius, Combeferre and his Eponine sat back down on the couch. Combeferre quickly lunged in and hugged Ep tightly with an uncontrollable smile on his face,

“What was that for?” Eponine was shocked by the suddenness of the beautiful man’s actions and sat there in confusion while she waited for a reply.

“I don’t need a reason,” he ran his hand through his Eponine’s hair, holding back the urge to tell her the truth. To tell her all about the secrets that he had been keeping, he looked away, unable to reveal anything to her. She knew he was hiding something and bit her lip to prevent herself from erupting at him about what she had heard that night. “I… I just love you, okay?”

“Yeah,” she sighed, “Love you too.”


	11. Chapter 11

The days were proving to be harder for Eponine, every day the thought of ‘Ferre’s secrets consumed her and she wondered how long it would be before she would overflow. It wasn’t long until people began to notice what she was doing, she was often found sitting in a dark room or standing and staring into a deep nothingness completely immersed in her own thoughts. It wasn’t until Cosette found her wandering in the shadows one night that she finally understood how dark of a place her mind was becoming. She’d been about to walk into a dark alleyway when Cosette’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts. Cosette walked over to where the girl stood,

“What are you doing Ep?” There was no reply. “Come on, it’s getting really late. I’ll take you back to my place and we can talk.” When the two arrived Cosette finally managed to get a coherent response from Eponine. It was the first time the two had even made eye contact that night, but the sight of the dark haired girl’s tear stained cheeks and red-rimmed eyes made her wish that they hadn’t. “Shit…. Ep. Tell me everything now.”

 

Eponine had finally fallen asleep on Cosette’s couch after the two girls shared a much needed talk. Cosette had eventually been able to convince Eponine that ‘Ferre loved her and that any secrets he was keeping were nothing to worry about. She texted Marius to let him know what had happened before calling Combeferre,

“Ep?”

“No, it’s Cosette. But Eponine is with me,” She checked to make sure the girl was asleep before continuing, she wanted to tell him about how paranoid Eponine had become about losing him but hoped that the conversation that the two girls had was enough to cheer her up, “Um… we lost track of the time while she was helping me with homework, so she’s crashing here tonight. She’s already asleep so I just thought I’d let you know.”

“Oh, thank God, I was beginning to worry about her. Could you just tell her that I’ll be meeting her at 1:30 for lunch tomorrow, rather than 12? Something really important has come up.”

“Yeah, sure thing. I’ll tell her in the morning.”

“Thanks Cosette. See you.” Cosette hung up the phone and sighed before covering the sleeping Eponine with a blanket and heading to bed.

 

Eponine sluggishly opened her eyes, unaware of her surroundings at first she jolted upright. She looked around for a minute before being hit with all the memories of the last night, smiling as she picked up her phone and saw a single message on it,

_“Cosette called me,_

_Sleep well my darling, I’ll see you for lunch tomorrow._

_I love you with all my heart._

_-Ferre.”_

“Cheesy bastard,” she murmured to herself before seeing the time, 11:38, “shit. I’m going to be late.” She rushed around Cosette’s house, running into the bathroom while praying that it was not occupied. Cosette had woken up when she heard the shower water running, she made her way out to the kitchen and began making breakfast for herself. Eponine ran past the kitchen and into the lounge room, 11:52, she picked up her phone and pulled her hair into a messy bun, shouting as she made her way to the front door, “Thanks for last night Cosette! Sorry I have to leave in such a rush! I’ll text you later!” Before Cosette could reply Eponine had flown out the door, and by the time Cosette had seen the clock and remembered what Combeferre had told her it was too late.

 

Eponine was nearly running down the street as she tried to think of what excuse she was going to use when she finally got to the café. She was stopped dead in her tracks when she arrived and witnessed an image which made her stomach tie itself in knots. There was Combeferre, laughing, sitting with his arm rested on the back of a chair, a chair which was seating a red-haired girl. Secrets. 


	12. Chapter 12

Eponine stood outside for what felt like hours but could’ve been no longer than a few minutes. She finally managed to push herself through the door just in time to see ‘Ferre jump up and wisp the red-haired girl while shouting sentences that Ep was too upset to understand, other than the words that stood out – ‘amazing’ and ‘perfect’. Combeferre put the girl down and spun around to see his Eponine standing in the doorway, her bottom lip trembling as she stared at him with a look of absolute betrayal. She stormed out, slamming the café door behind her. She began to walk, she didn’t know where she was going or how long it would take to get there, she was just determined to get as far away from that man as physically possible. Her heart was beating so loud that Ep could barely hear any of the noises around her, she’d almost lost grip with reality when she felt a firm grip on her shoulder,

“Eponine, what are you doing?”

“Getting away from you.” She turned to face him completely, shaking off the grip he had on her. “How could you do this to me?”

“What are you talking about Ep?”

“Her.” Combeferre’s face dropped when he finally realised what was going on,

“Ep… please let me explain.” She wasn’t listening to him, she could feel her eyes burning with the approaching tears that she was desperately trying to hold back. “you know that I love you, I would never do anything to hurt you.” Eponine began to laugh, she didn’t know why but it was all that she could do to stop herself from crying. She rubbed her face before turning back to the man,

“I can’t believe you would do this to me.”

“Ep…” Combeferre knew that arguing was pointless but he couldn’t stand the thought of his Eponine leaving. “Just… tell me what I need to do,”

“You know that philosophy trip that you declined?” She swallowed hard, giving all of her energy into her attempt to not break down right there and then. “You… you should take it.” Ep let a single tear escape.

“Is that what you want me to do?” Ep nodded even though all she wanted to do was say no. She was so angry at Combeferre, but she hated the thought of being away from him. Eponine was so desperately in love with this man who now looked so weak standing in front of her. “Okay Ep… you win. I’ll go.” The words hit her hard, but they nearly killed him to say. He began to walk away, not letting himself break down until he was safely around the corner.

 

It was three days later when Courfeyrac found Combeferre. He was sitting outside a pub with a bottle of vodka in his hand. Courf could barely understand him, but heard enough to see that he had been kicked out of the pub when it had closed at 2am and had been sitting outside waiting for it to open again. Courfeyrac tried to hide how worried he was, he’d never seen anyone other than Grantaire this drunk, and he was sure that Combeferre’s body couldn’t handle the amount of alcohol that it had been given.

“Let’s get you home buddy.” ‘Ferre could only give a short groan as a response before Courf flung the man’s arm over his shoulders. The walk home took longer than usual, Courfeyrac was practically dragging Combeferre who couldn’t even remember what day it was.

When the two arrived Courfeyrac threw Combeferre onto his bed before taking off his shoes and covering him with a blanket. He left the room and returned with 2 pills and a glass of water. Courf was just about to walk out of the room when he felt a hand loosely grab his wrist, he turned around to see ‘Ferre looking up at him,

“I don’t want to live without her.” Combeferre began to sob uncontrollably, Courfeyrac could do nothing but sit and attempt to console the man,

“You won’t have to mate. You two will be fine. Every couple has problems sometimes.”

“She hates me Courf. I love her and she hates me.” Courfeyrac had no words for the man. Combeferre’s sobs began to slow and after an hour he had finally fallen asleep with Combeferre still sitting next to him. Courfeyrac got up and looked down at the man,

“You’ll be okay ‘Ferre,” he whispered, “I promise you’ll be okay.”


	13. Chapter 13

Courfeyrac never told anyone about what happened that night, when asked he just said that Combeferre isolated himself so that he could study even though he knew that no one really believed him. He started spending more time with Combeferre, keeping him distracted was the only thing that he knew would keep the man sane. ‘Ferre spent most of his time consumed in the thought of his Eponine and what she had said to him that day at the café. He knew that if he could’ve he would have stayed there and fought for her, he would’ve made her listen to him but now all that seemed rational was to do as the girl had told him.

 

“Sir?” Combeferre hesitantly approached his professor, parts of him still didn’t want to have this conversation but he knew that it was what he had to do.

“The answer is yes.”

“Sorry?”

“You think that I don’t know what goes on in my own class?” He finally turned to face Combeferre, sighing as he leaned on the edge of his desk, “You need some time away from the... troubles in your personal life, and you were going to ask if the opportunity for the philosophy trip is still available. The answer is yes.” A part of Combeferre wanted to explain the truth about what happened, but decided against it and simply nodded, avoiding eye contact. “Relationships are tricky,” the man continued, “and sadly it doesn’t get any easier.”

“So what am I meant to do?” Combeferre looked up to his professor, “I mean…”

“If you want my advice boy, it’s an eye for an eye out there in the real world. You have to do everything in your power not to fall. Turn your heart to stone, work, succeed and once you have all of the knowledge you need and all of the power that you can understand, only then should you let yourself be vulnerable.” Combeferre tried not to laugh in the man’s face, there was no way any of this advice would be helpful, especially since it came from a 50-something year old man who was evidently still not married. There was only one piece of this advice that ‘Ferre was inclined to listen to. _Turn your heart to stone._

 

It was early in the morning when Eponine had been awoken by a knock on her front door, far earlier than she would have usually permitted but today she made an exception seeing as she’d been awake all night anyway. Her stomach dropped when she opened the door only to see Combeferre standing in front of her. All of the emotion that she had admired was drained from his face, the bags under his eyes showed that he had been sleeping just about as well as her. All Eponine wanted to do was pull the man into a tight embrace and never let go, but before her body compelled her to do so she was reminded of the anger that had been eating away at her,

“What are you doing here?” She looked down at the ground, knowing that she didn’t want to see the pain that her words would bring to the man.

“I just wanted to let you know that I did what you said.” She looked up at him confused. He sighed and rubbed his forehead before continuing, “I’m going to London for the philosophy trip.” He was using all of his strength for his efforts to not cry as well as not to beg Eponine to let him explain,

“Good.” Eponine didn’t really mean the words, she just didn’t know what else to say. Most of what she said had been this way since that day at the café.  All she really wanted was to forgive the still beautiful man who was standing so helplessly in her door way, to try and forget anything had ever happened and to just move on with the man that she was so desperately in love with. Ep looked up at Combeferre, who had let his tears begin to fall,

“Yeah…” He quickly brushed the tears away from his eyes, “I leave in a month so I guess you won’t have to deal with my shit for much longer.” He forced himself away from the doorway, blocking out everything around him and just concentrating on not turning back, he didn’t hear Eponine as she called for him to come back. He just kept walking until he finally found his way home. 


	14. Chapter 14

“Anything left to do?” Courfeyrac shouted to Combeferre as he rushed around, checking every room for a trace of something that he might accidentally leave behind.

“Umm, no. I think that’s everything.” ‘Ferre finally stopped by the kitchen counter picking up a picture of him and Eponine, he was haunted by the memories that flooded him at the sight of the both of them looking so happy together. He internally debated whether or not he wanted to leave it behind,

“Let’s go then. You’re going to be late.” With that Combeferre flung his backpack over his shoulder and followed Courf out the door, lingering in the doorway for a moment before closing it and locking in completely behind him. He sat in the passenger seat as Courfeyrac started the car, staring out the window as he tried to force himself to leave all of his emotions behind him. He traced his fingers over the stubble that still remained on his chin, forcing away every memory of Eponine’s fingers doing the same. He swallowed hard as they turned on to the freeway, already aching for the moment that he could return.

 

_“Cosette, are you busy?_

_-Ep”_

_“Not busy, what’s up?”_

_“Can you come over?_

_Need a chat.”_

_“Be there soon xx.”_

It was on the verge of raining when Cosette arrived at Eponine’s door, she knocked quickly, pleading with the sky to just hold on until she was inside. Ep opened the door and pulled the blonde girl into a hug, it took a moment for Cosette to catch up to Eponine’s quick movements and before she knew it she was inside and the door had been shut behind her.

“What’s going on Ep?” Cosette watched the girl, who had begun pacing through her lounge room,

“Uhh…” She was still pacing, her thoughts moving almost as fast as she was. “I messed up Cosette. I messed up bad. Like, really bad. I don’t know what to do.”

“Ep. Slow down.” Cosette reached out and put her hands on Eponine’s shoulders, waiting for the girl to finally look her in the eye before motioning towards the couch. Ep complied and slumped down on the couch covering her face with her hands,

“It’s bad Cosette.”

“Just… go back to the start.”

 

“Good morning my darling.” The familiar voice lured Eponine out of a blissful day dream. It was a beautiful day and the sun was shining much brighter than usual. She turned her head as Combeferre sat beside her on the park bench and put his arm around her. He leaned in close and whispered in her ear, “I love you so much.” Eponine tried to reply but when she opened her mouth nothing came out. “I love you Ep.” Still she could not force any sound, she began to panic. Tears were forming in her eyes as she turned to face the man, “You don’t love me anymore.” She desperately tried to tell him the truth, tell him that she still loved him with all his heart but still there was nothing coming out of her mouth. She snapped her eyes open, only to realise that she was alone in her bedroom, as she sat up she instantly wished that she hadn’t as the feeling of sickness washed over her.

Cosette was already awake when Eponine came trudging out of the bathroom,

“Morning sunshine!” The blonde mocked the girl who looked as though she’d been hit by a bus, “How you feeling?”

“Like death.” Ep groaned, walking into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, “This is going to bloody kill me.” Cosette looked at the girl, she knew that Eponine was trying to stay strong, but she could also tell by the look on her face that she was really struggling.

“Ep…” she hesitated, “you don’t have to do this alone, you know? If you just called him-“

“No!” the outburst shocked Cosette, “It’s not like he’d come back anyway, I was horrible to him… and now he’s gone.” She sat down and wiped her face with her hand, “He’s not coming back Cosette. So, I just have to try and…” Eponine swallowed hard, “try and not love him.” The words hit Cosette hard, she had no idea what to say to the girl who was always so strong but now seemed so weak. She was about to open a mouth when there was a knock on the door. Eponine got up, wiping her eyes as she walked towards the door. In the back of her mind she hoped that it would be the beautiful man, Combeferre, but nothing could prepare her for who she would see standing in her doorway. She inched the door open and stared in shock at a red-haired woman who she’d seen before. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is most likely the last chapter that I will be putting up for this work.  
> I hope people have enjoyed it :)

Eponine had to fight every urge that she had to just close the door in the red-haired girl’s face. She felt her entire body tense up as she was suddenly hit with every bad feeling that she’d had about her and Combeferre,

“Please don’t freak out. My name is Sierra, I’m the owner of La Beauté de Nous.” Eponine couldn’t believe her ears, why was the owner of her favourite restaurant standing at her door, and why was she with Combeferre? “I was good friends with ‘Ferre in high school so when he called me and asked for a favour, I couldn’t say no.” Ep stood aside, allowing Sierra to come inside. “I won’t stay for long, Combeferre sent this to me the other day and asked me to deliver it, I don’t know why.” She held out an envelope to Eponine who took it with shaky hands.

“Thank you for coming past Sierra.”

“Oh it’s not a problem at all, tell Combeferre that the deal is still available when he gets back.” Eponine stared at the envelope which had her name written in the beautiful handwriting that she recognised instantly as Combeferre’s, it wasn’t until she noticed Cosette standing beside her that she made the decision to open it.

**Present time**

“Keep reading Ep.” Cosette looked at the shaking girl who looked like she would cry before she said another word. Eponine cleared her throat before continuing,

“I knew from the moment that I met you that I wanted to be around you for the rest of my life. I wanted to keep you safe, I wanted to keep you close and I wanted to do whatever I could to make you happy.

When you saw me with Sierra, I panicked at first simply because I’d never been able to keep a secret from anybody, especially not someone who meant as much to me as you, and this secret was the most important one of my life. I didn’t want you to see all the plans that I had made for…” Ep gasped and covered her mouth with her hand, tears began rushing from her eyes. “…the plans that I made for the night I was going to propose to you. Then I saw your face, you looked so heart broken and at first I couldn’t understand what was going on. After I caught up with you I realised how bad it must have looked to have seen me with her, and if I could fix everything that went wrong that day I would. I would have made you listen to me as I explained how much I loved you, how much I always have loved you and how much I will continue to love you for the rest of my life.

I pray to God every day that you won’t hate me anymore, that you could find a way to love me through all the bad things that you thought of me. But most of all I hope that you could forgive me for not fighting for you, I would do anything to make you happy my Eponine, even if that means leaving.

Just know my darling that even though I’m far away for the now, my love for you grows with every breath and every step that I take is one that I wish would bring me back to you. Nothing you could do will ever make me stop loving you, and I never want to stop loving you.

I will be back soon my Eponine, but I will not be home until you are in my arms again.

All of my love,

Combeferre.”

Eponine placed the letter down, picking up the envelope again to pull out the photo that was enclosed. It was a picture of the two of them that she had completely forgotten about until that very moment. She traced a finger over his smiling face and was flooded with the memory that accompanied the photograph. She turned it over to see writing scrawled on the back of it,

“ _P.S. It was very hard for me to separate myself from this photo, it’s been all that has kept me sane in the time that I’ve spent away from you. This is just proof that you are all that I have been thinking about._

_I miss us._

_-Combeferre.”_

A tear fell from Eponine’s eye, she didn’t bother trying to wipe it away as she knew that it would quickly be replaced with another. She’d forgotten that Cosette was there until she felt a warm hand on her shoulder. Eponine looked Cosette in the eye and already Cosette knew what the girl was thinking. Ep looked down and placed a hand on her stomach, she swallowed hard,

“I have to go find him.”


End file.
